Oh, Star Wars. It’s coming. I can feel it so strong, oh my gosh, it’s almost here, it’s so exciting I feel like a tightness in my throat and chest, and it’s just like the best birthday present ever waiting to be opened!!!! (Between Amy and Sheldon having sex in this week’s episode of “The Big Bang Theory” – stay tuned for that post on Thursday night – and Star Wars coming out, this is like the biggest week ever ever ever ever.)

I watched the first two trailers for Star Wars Episode 7: The Force Awakens and I cried during both. Then I decided to stop watching trailers, to do this whole thing retro because this old school mama wants less reveal and more suspense. I don’t want to keep seeing snippet after snippet and being teased and teased…I’ve had enough of that as Amy! I want to return to the days when you knew something was coming out and then you just got all excited with anticipation and then you went and saw it.

Where’s Luke? Does Han die? Does everyone die? There’s too much guessing and speculation and it’s freaking me out. I can’t take it anymore. Just bring me all of it on a plate of Star Wars goodness and I will show up and devour it whole. I’ll spit some of the bones out, but I’ll ingest the others because it’s just going to feel so good to CONSUME THIS MOVIE.

For a bunch of reasons, I am going to have to wait it out and not see it until the week after the movie comes out, but my ex is taking our boys pretty much the day it is released and they are beyond excited. They have never seen a “big kid” movie in the theaters – before this, the only movies they’ve seen in movie theaters are cartoons.

This will also be the first PG-13 movie they’re seeing in the theaters. They’ve only seen two other PG-13 movies, both on our living room couch. The first was Star Wars Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith, which we prepared Little Man for by explaining every single scary thing that was going to happen in great detail beforehand, complete with pausing throughout the movie to remind him what was about to happen. He is very sensitive and we had to take a few breaks but he felt really good about it after. The second PG-13 movie they’ve seen was, in what I freely admit was a bad judgment on my part: Liar Liar. (Not only are there some references to sex stuff which they didn’t need to see, it’s also totally about a child wishing his divorced parents would get back together and they totally do so that was just not a smart pick by me on many counts.)

My kids are much more “sheltered” than a lot of kids. They don’t watch “The Big Bang Theory” and they don’t surf the web and don’t have cell phones or play computer games. And we waited a good 5 years longer than everyone we knew to show them the Star Wars movies.

But now that we have seen the first six, I am okay with them seeing the next installment. It is an important thing for my sons to see this movie in the theaters with all the other kids they know who will be seeing it, too. It feels culturally appropriate. It feels cohesive in a lot of ways.

For those of you seeing the movie right when it comes out, enjoy it to the fullest. For those of you waiting a bit, stay off of social media. I’ll try to avoid any big spoilers, but I also know that whenever and however I do see it, it’s going to be amazing even if I know that everyone dies.

It’s going to be epic, no matter what. Enjoy!!!

Vintage Mayim in her C-3PO underoos